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Self-Sabotage: It’s an Inside Job

Candace Aliké Smith

It wasn’t until recently that when I, Cherise, really began to look at the notion of self-sabotage, that I realized I may not know as much as I thought I did.

In a Facebook group discussion, we were attempting to determine why we felt stuck and not achieving our dreams. The question was asked if we were sabotaging our success? To make sure I was answering honestly, I first looked at the definition for sabotage.

Sabotage: To deliberately, destroy, damage, or obstruct.

Once I saw the word deliberately, I immediately dismissed this as being a personal issue and then questioned if I had been using the word incorrectly in the past. Deliberate? That was a game changer.


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Blog Posts, Health and Wellness, Previous Posts

At 61, I’m Yet Alive!

Repost by original author as seen on CandaceAlikeSmith.com

Candace Aliké Smith

Mental Health and Aging

Hi there. Cherise here.

Just eight months shy of reaching her 100th birthday, my grandmother made her transition from this life to her eternal rest. Months later, I still find myself saying, “She really did die.”

Not that I thought she would live forever, but I did think she would live to see the 100th birthday she very much wanted to reach. Already the oldest living relative in our family, Grandmother dealt with diabetes, beat cancer, was wheeled away from COVID at the age of ninety-eight, and maintained perfect church attendance despite a pandemic and losing her eyesight. Grandmother outlived four husbands (three exes and one current) and two of her children. Death just didn’t seem likely when it came to Grandmother.

Grandmother’s death came a year after the loss of one son and less than two months before the passing of her youngest daughter. During…

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Texas? Texas!

Of all the moves I’ve made since 2009, I think this one has special meaning. The move from Indiana to California had to do with feeling unsatisfied in various areas of my life and wanting a change. For close to a year, I planned and prepared as best I could and after enduring some bumps,… Continue reading Texas? Texas!

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From Excess to Abundance

Sorting. Stacking. And saying “Good-bye” Tossing. Throwing. And questioning why it’s hard to say “Good-bye” Photo by Maude Frédérique Lavoie on Unsplash I desire to be free from: Fear. Worry. Doubt. Anger. Regret. Hurts. Excess. Negative thoughts and memories. Making room for: Love. Peace. Joy. Community. Health. Healing. A life I love living. Photo by… Continue reading From Excess to Abundance

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I’m at the Age When…

I’m at the age when I see less and more My eyes squint for different reasons because My focus is clearer and less cloudy I’m at the age where my time is shorter and yet more valuable It’s redeemable and yet well spent Time to be redeemed, and energy and space Photo by Eye for… Continue reading I’m at the Age When…

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Dear 30-Year-Old Me

Dear 30-year-old Me, Cherish the time you spend with that little girl and don’t become upset if your memories are different from hers. Let her know she is loved and valued and only responsible for her feelings and herself. As you watch her mature, know that she is developing into who she needs to be… Continue reading Dear 30-Year-Old Me